I keep looking at the title of this blog, and thinking about how poorly I've lived up to the "loving" part. Most of my posts are filled with cranky ravings about the things I don't like, rather than the things that bring me joy. No more.
I have these moments often - the ones where I realize that I'm putting way too much negative energy out into the world, with no real plan for addressing the problems that I see. I live in a city where I feel constantly bombarded by negative energies and rather than wearing my positive energy like a shield, I accept that negative energy, and worse, contribute to it. But I'm really making an effort to change that; I'm so tired of feeling... well, tired! And bitchy and aggressive. I know that I am perfectly entitled to feelings of a less positive nature (no one can be perfectly sunny all the time, of this I am convinced), but I am trying to work on how I deal with them.
One of the first steps I'm taking is changing my diet. More vegetables! Less refined sugar! And probably most important, smaller portion sizes! Maybe this sounds ridiculous, but I do believe that the food we choose to fuel our bodies with makes a difference in how we feel. I've tried, for the last month, to consume fewer refined sugars because I noticed that when I ate a lot of candy, I felt more depressed (I have an almost insatiable sweet tooth). Maybe it's a mind-over-matter thing, but I feel so much happier lately. So, sugar or no sugar, the effort to change my diet has definitely improved my mood (however, I refuse to give up ice cream, so that has become my refined-sugar-treat-at-the-end-of-the-day of choice).
I'm also just trying to focus on the good things that I have in my life - my friends and family, my home (beautiful!), my crafting, my job. All of these things that bring so much love and goodness to my tiny daily existence make it all seem so much more worthwhile. I'm going to try to journal more (in general), blog more (here, at Which Stitchery and Sacred Spiral Pottery), and in general be more present in my life and more intentional in what I say and do. I think a lot of this will involve listening. To myself, to others, to the Universe. Listening, and planning a little more, and maybe drinking more tea. ^.^
I feel so amazing today. I smell delicious (thank you, Etsy), I'm wearing clothes that make me feel like a gypsy (in the best possible way), and I got an email this morning from the New York Blood Center detailing where the blood I donated went to (so cool!). And I feel like I can do damn near anything. Perhaps when I get home tonight, I'll fix up my craft room proper so I can sew to my heart's content later this week.
And on that note, I'm going to go off and be a productive little bee. Enjoy this marvelous, beautiful summer day! ^_^
Dewa, mata.
